My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
It's rum buckets o'clock
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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