Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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