and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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