Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
