What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
