Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.

Fav 8 4557 689
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(614): View more from Ohio

I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner

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(435): View more from Utah

I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,

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(817): View more from Texas

Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka

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(419): View more from Ohio

He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night

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