i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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