Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
