Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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