weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
