god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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