put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
