shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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