please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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