Just fell off a train. Bad.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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