dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
We don't watch enough power rangers
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Terrible idea I love it
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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