Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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