i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
