I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize