Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Randomize
