i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
