i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
