I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
