its not stalking. its research.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I can't trust your balls anymore.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
