Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize