That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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