Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
