bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
