some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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