It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
