I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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