hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
