Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
