We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
should my penis look like a turkey
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
