That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
