Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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