morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
