Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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