just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
