I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
