on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Dick very happy bro
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
