Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Randomize
