some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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