It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Come see our sink grown plant.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
