apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
