He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Its about making memories worth repressing
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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