i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
