Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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