yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
