Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize