Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
