On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I think your dad took our porno
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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