Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
